It wasn't a perfect day. I started out with a migraine, my phone’s battery was low, and the generator had packed up. It was the Headies and I had planned on making a memorable entrance on the red carpet.
I just bagged 4 nominations at the Nigerian Blog awards, including the highly coveted blog of the year. What a better way to celebrate. I had thought up possible questions. Can we know you? And then my answers. Proud moment
I had narrowed my choices to three rumpled dresses. The only problem was, there was no electricity and I hoped Nepa would restore it. By 4pm, I started to get worried, by 5 pm, panic set in. By 5:30pm all hopes of ironing my rumpled clothes was dashed, so, my friend & 1 rummaged through my clothes like two mad women, searching for an alternative.
We settled for a peach colored skirt, a peach rumpled top which I planned to explain to everyone that, that was just the latest trend. Slathering on tons of makeup, splashing all sorts of perfumes..I looked into the mirror and it screamed hot. I was a stunner.
I was just about to call a pal to drop us off when my phone’s battery drained and shut down.”Great” I yelled. Now, we were cut off and I couldn’t even retrieve the number. After waiting for 1 hour, and cursing the generation of invisible PHCN officials, it was now 7pm so we decided to get a cab.
We didn’t anticipate waiting for an empty cab for close to an hour. The dust from the un-tarred road had settled on us .
The perfume we wore had evaporated from our bodies, our makeup wearing out, our shoulders once high, were now hunched.” perfect, perfect” I muttered.Then we saw an empty cab and hopped in, to my delight, the cab driver had a phone charger which I put to use. I thought of calling the lady who had my tickets to intimate her about our movements, but waived it off to first salvage what was left of my appearance. Slathering on more lipstick, mascara, brushing my hair, spraying on more perfume. I wasn't too bad.”
I bet we’ll be on the best dressed list”I reassured my friend who smiled back.That was short-lived as we drove into the Eko Hotel premises, the array of beautiful ladies, stunning gowns, well made up faces, the wisp of expensive perfumes told me, I had to try harder to even get a picture taken on the red carpet.
All my hopes of hearing the question”OMG! What are you wearing” was dashed. I was just one of the ladies in a mini skirt.Alighting from the cab, we got a few stares from men”
Men always stare” so that did nothing to increase my wavering confidence.
Then I thought of calling the lady with the tickets and it hit me, in a bid to charge, I had forgotten my phone in that cab. For a few seconds, we were in a confused state we watched him drive out sight. Thinking of calling the number, I recalled I switched it off to charge faster.
Damn! I let out a loud scream “wait “! Everyone turned in my direction. Then I saw him at the security post of the gate, I broke into a run hampered by my uncomfortable 6 inch heels. On a 2nd thought, I stopped to take them off, flung them at my confused friend and broke into a sprint to the dismay of everyone .
I ran down jumping over cars in my short skirt, bumping into people. I heard some1 yell” Miss Petite” What a way to launch my career, I didn’t care, if this man left with my phone, my career would be dead anyways. I was too late.The noise droned out my screams for the security man to stop him. I watched the cab pick up speed as he drove out of sight. Like a robot, I kept chasing him out of the hotel. I must have chased him for 1 minute before it hit me. My phone, my contacts, my life was gone, in that 2,500 paid cab.
“Oh my God! The tickets “There was no way of getting the tickets.I just stood there watching all the exotic ladies pass me by. The shock on their faces when they saw my disheveled appearance and bare feet said it all. I was doomed. A guy walked past and said” You look sexy baby” when he noticed I wasn’t wearing shoes, he recoiled (probably thought I was a pretty mad girl)
Then it hit me, i didn't even backup my contacts Thinking my friend would come and meet me with my shoes, I was mistaken because she decided to wait at the lobby, praying the cab man would notice the phone and turn around to where he dropped us off.
Taking a 3 minutes’ walk of shame back to the lobby, I saw the stars pass us by. All these stars I blog about. They all looked glamorous. We prayed some 1 would come to our rescue.That didn’t happen as time ticked and passed by. It was nearing 10:30 and everyone had gone to the red carpet to take pictures.
We were now with the others” Those people who hang around events hoping to get in free during the closing performance”At that point in time, we decided to leave and go back home. While the last people trickled in, we were the only ladies walking out.
We got a cab home and I slept all Sunday, mourning the loss of my phone and of course not witnessing Burna Boy's fall 1st hand at the Headies.At about 5 pm, I got a call. Emeh, your phone is ringing. A man picked up and said he’s been trying to get across to you. OMG!I jumped out of bed, dialed my number and yes ,it was the cab man He found my phone and asked me to come get it. In Lagos?
Fast-forward to an hour later, there I was with my blackberry , saying a prayer for this honest Nigerian,
I said’ fuck the Headies”Of course,I didn't mean that. lol
You have read this article with the title October 2012. You can bookmark this page URL http://scenesfromahomeoffice.blogspot.com/2012/10/diary-of-embarrassed-blogger.html. Thanks!
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Miss Petite Nigeria 
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